[25M] Having intimacy issues with my pregnant girlfriend [25F] and I don’t know if I’m missing something

[25M] Having intimacy issues with my pregnant girlfriend [25F] and I don’t know if I’m missing something

I’m 25 and my girlfriend is 25. We’ve been together for just under a year. She has a 3-year-old son from a previous relationship and she’s currently around 35 weeks pregnant with our baby.

Things moved quickly between us. I moved into her parents’ house early in the relationship. The house was overcrowded, there was very little privacy, and I felt her mum could be quite overbearing when it came to parenting decisions. Her parents also regularly smoked cigarettes and weed around her son, which I wasn’t comfortable with.

She was on the council housing list but wasn’t getting anywhere, so I suggested we move to a cheaper seaside town about an hour away and rent privately. I drive and she doesn’t, but I promised I’d make sure she still saw her family regularly and I’ve kept that promise.

Since moving, we’ve had one problem after another. The house has had electrical issues, leaks, damp and mould. At one point it was deemed unsafe and we had to move into temporary accommodation for a few weeks. During all of this, her son’s autism assessment pathway was closed because we moved areas and he can’t start school until September.

I’m currently working 6 days a week, mostly evenings, because I’m trying to keep a roof over our heads and prepare for our baby arriving in around 5 weeks. I’m exhausted most of the time.

Recently my girlfriend told me she feels lonely, isolated and disconnected from me. She says we’re more like roommates than a couple and that there’s very little intimacy between us.

Part of the argument started after she found a pair of my boxers with semen in them and thought I was going off to masturbate instead of being intimate with her. I explained they were from a wet dream and not something I could control, but she was still upset by it.

The bigger issue seems to be that she feels unwanted and disconnected, while I feel completely burnt out.

She says she can’t be in a sexless relationship. From my side, it’s not that I don’t love her or find her attractive. I just feel exhausted, stressed and overwhelmed by everything that’s going on. Between work, housing issues, financial pressure and preparing for a newborn, sex hasn’t been high on my list of priorities.

She says she’s worried this is what our future will look like forever. I feel like I’m doing everything I can to support our family and keep us afloat, but at the same time I’m wondering if I’ve become so focused on surviving financially that I’ve neglected the relationship without realising it.

I genuinely don’t know if we’re arguing about sex or if sex is just a symptom of a bigger problem.

What should I do here? Am I missing her point entirely? Is this mainly about emotional intimacy and connection rather than sex itself, and if so how do we fix it before the baby arrives?

TLDR: My pregnant girlfriend feels disconnected from me because our sex life has almost disappeared. I’m working 6 days a week while dealing with housing problems, financial stress and preparing for our baby. She feels lonely and unwanted, while I feel exhausted and overwhelmed. Am I missing her point, and how do we fix this?