Rocd convincing me I’m meant to be non-monogamous - anybody else experienced this?

So I’ve been struggling with cheating OCD for a couple of months because I got too drunk and realised I was attracted to somebody and I guess considered getting close to her. I didn’t act on it thankfully, but I’m convinced now I’m inevitably going to cheat and ruin everything etc.

This has obviously continued to spiral. I’m still worried about cheating, but I’m now also just terrified about EVERYTHING. Maybe I’m not supposed to be in a relationship? Maybe I’m a sex addict? Maybe humans are not supposed to be monogamous biologically, so I WILL inevitably cheat (but that still won’t make it ok ofc). Maybe my sex drive is unnaturally high, and I’ll never stop feeling attraction to other people, so I shouldn’t be monogamous? Why am I in a monogamous relationship if I feel such strong attraction to other people? Why is our society built around monogamy if so many people cheat or divorce? Why can’t I be like others who seem to never have eyes for others? Am I only monogamous because a capitalist society thrives by promoting monogamy it. Etc etc.

This shit makes life unliveable. I know most people don’t think like this. But I can’t help it.

I’m not asking for reassurance about anything. Just wondering if anybody else has experienced this. I mean I THINK I would choose monogamy for my life, but I am actually not sure now.