A beast of a perfume review post

I’m recently getting into fragrances after being a life long avoider due to being very prone to headaches induced by strong smells and perfume. but one day last year I was in my local bubble tea shop and thought hm I wish I could smell like this all the time…. started doing some research and settled on trying out london fog from lovesick witchery. it rocked! since then I’ve been dabbling in testing out different indie perfumes, with a focus on gourmands and atmospherics. this sampling has picked up a lot over the last few months as I need something to fuel me through working full time and going to grad school full time online, so I figured why not post some reviews since I’ve other people’s to be so helpful!

things I want to smell like: milky tea, baked goods to eat with the tea (ideally made in a cottage), a witch that makes said baked goods in said cottage, the cozy yet spooky forest the cottage is in.

1/5 nooooooooo get it away

2/5 not good

3/5 not horrible

4/5 I like it

5/5 I love it

lovesick witchery:

london fog: the one that started it all <3 smells identical to walking into my local tea shop and sipping on a deliciously milky syrupy london fog latte. I desperately wish it had more longevity, as I’m rolling this thing on me like bug spray at the lake but it’s still fading to a whisper after an hour or so. 4.5/5

strange creature: free roller ball added to my order ! the name is accurate here. smells like a soil covered resinous chocolate orange. I don’t find myself wanting to wear it often, but I feel oddly protective over its weirdness? like if someone else said something bad about it I’d want to defend it. 3.5/5

sunlit poet: hippie flower power all the way! got this for a friend and she really likes it. like a lovely soup of orange pez and fresh gardenias. too floral for me but overall fresh and pretty and good if you like the notes listed! 3/5

gingersnap: christmas candle yuckiness :-( tried to make it work but it’s too cloying and sticky smelling. will say, it’s true to the description so gets some credit for that. 1/5

little book eater (samples from website):

the black lodge: good!!! best of the LBE bunch by far. smells like trees and mysteries…. like cooking bacon over a campfire while an animal rustles somewhere in the darkness. overall I dig it. plus I love twin peaks, so there’s that. 4/5

anne of green gables: I like it, though I don’t get any earl gray sadly. pear is definitely coming through nice and sweet. it’s giving craft store during the holidays, but also spring time? not really for me but I can appreciate. 3/5

dana scully: I love x-files so I was so excited about this but to be brutally honest, they did scully dirty with this one :-/ smells like a car/bathroom air freshener. I like orange scents but something about the mix of notes is throwing me way off here. 1/5 (gave to a friend and her boyfriend loves it lol)

psalm for the wild-built: lots of potential but unfortunately the eucalyptus was pretty forward and the overall combo ended up very soapy. love the idea of a really herbal perfume like this, but now I know eucalyptus is not a note I want to wear. 2/5 (gave to a friend and she loved it)

agent coopers jelly donut: this is strawberry lip smackers through and through. not bad necessarily, but not the gourmand I was expecting. I’d prob wear on occasion if I’m feeling fruity 3/5

reading the porch: despite having other notes listed, this is just straight up honeysuckle to me. smells objectively nice, but I think sadly florals are just not for me. this gave me a headache pretty quickly, but if you’re a floral lover, you’ll probably love this. 2/5

olympic orchids (samples from website):

woodcut: smells like the home depot lumber aisle. weird, but good weird. got it for my partner who is an arborist and she likes it but also already smells like this most of the time naturally lol. 4/5

carolina: very syrupy with a punch of florals and a pinch of tobacco. I’m happy with it objectively but it’s not a scent I’d want to smell like personally. 3/5

blackbird: the blackberry is really nice and tart, however the overall combo of everything is a bit too soapy and perfumey for my tastes and brings on a bit of a headache. curious to try more blackberry perfume in the future, though I had a blackberry vape for a long time and I think the association may be too strong… we shall see. 2/5

night flyer: yes. just yes. maybe I’m biased because bats are my favorite animal and I’ve been obsessed with them since I was 5 but this is really good stuff. doesn’t smell like a bat or where a bat lives (thankfully), smells like the type of perfume a cute yet mysterious little fuzzy brown bat would wear. gotta smell it to understand. 5/5

haus of gloi round 1 (5ml oils from website):

corn cakes: I’ve been putting off writing this review…. desperately wanted a gourmand sweet corn flavor but sadly got something that is indescribably weird. out of the bottle it’s cloying, buttery, and kinda yucky. if you want to smell like thanksgiving dinner you may like this. however, I did not. planning to try it again in the fall and see what I think, but for now I couldn’t even try it on without gagging. tragic. I want to give it a 1 but feels wrong since I didn’t try it on my skin… ?/5

blood orange marshmallow: yummy! smells like orange cream coca cola. which I just looked up and found out is recently discontinued. absolutely heartbroken. anyway, this is easy to wear, and only caused a headache when I spilled a bit on my shirt. note to self, roller balls only from here on out. I did have an orange scented carpet cleaner once that it is reminding me of a but which is unfortunate but that’s not the perfume’s fault. also, goes very well with my vanilla buttercream deodorant lol 4/5

blackcurrant tea: free sample included in my first order. a bit astringent, sour, and fruity. not my thing but I gave it to a friend who loves it. 2/5

andromedas curse (samples from website):

ouija: don’t love it, don’t hate it. smells like being 15 and smoking your mom’s stolen cigarettes then chewing bubblegum and burning nag champa to cover it up. doesn’t smell like cigarettes at all, just the memories of those times. ah to be young. too headshop for me to want to wear often but the nostalgia gives me a soft spot for it. 3/5

baby bat: wait a second… this smells exactly like ouija? and yes i picked it based on the name (see obsession with bats above). for real though, smells like sweet incense which is weird because there’s no incense notes listed. maybe the clove? after a few hours the vanilla comes forward a bit more. 2.5/5

sea of trees: OKAY stop this also smells extremely similar to ouija lol. i started doubting my sense of smell when testing this one. but to be fair, incense is listed in the description. as it settled the woodsy notes came forward a bit more but the incense is still pretty strong. i like the mixture of trees a lot so i think I’d be more likely to wear this one than any of the others, but still makes me feel like I just walked out of a crystal shop and not in my ideal way. 3/5

patisserie: okay now i’m starting to wonder if the samples were mislabeled or if my nose is just really bad at smelling anything past an incense note. very similar to the other samples from andromeda. wanted a straight up gourmand but on me this just isn’t, even after a few hours. maybe will let it rest for a few weeks and see if anything changes? 2.5/5

wyvern: tbh I got this one cause I like dragons. similar to the other samples with a strong incense note. overall is a very sticky smokey dragons blood, still trying to decide if this is a smell that works on me but I do think it’s fun and true to its description. 3/5

bubblegum cotton candy: extra free sample. smells like the name, veryyyy bubblegum, a lot more than ouija. alas there is some incense smell floating in the background. cross contamination or the base they use? 2/5

haus of gloi round 2 (sample vials from website):

ghost puffs: hehe yay kettlecorn perfume! I will say it makes me hungry, but worth it to smell like a carnival. was holding my breath with this one worried that the butter notes could have been part of the grossness of corn cakes but it works well in here. don’t see myself wearing this much this time of year but once halloween time rolls around I’m gonna be irresistible. 5/5

chamomile creme brulee: smells like my vanilla buttercream deodorant, yay! frosting vibes. I like it. not getting much chamomile which is okay but knocking off half a point for it. 3.5/5

troika: weirddddd this smells like maraschino cherries out of the bottle. after drying down however the milky notes came out, and after an hour or so it was like a pretty sunscreen smell? don’t think I’d full size but would be fun for the occasional summer day. 4/5

cozy sweater: eehhhhhh i think all the incense chaos from andromedas curse ruined this one for me sadly. I know this is one of their most popular scents but I feel burned by the nag champa smacking me upside the head in so many samples lately. to be fair, it’s pretty true to the description. but, it ain’t for me. 2/5

azure dragon: I’m having trouble reviewing this one tbh because I’m scared of putting the dragons blood on and not being able to get it off. I thought I liked the note but turns out it’s just nostalgic I think. in the bottle it’s an aquatic and incense heavy scent with some sweetness in the background. ?/5

long winters nap: nope nope nope, smells like a cheap cinnamon candle out of the bottle. I know this will give me a headache so not even going to try. description sounded like I would love it, sigh. goes to show sampling is crucial! will give to a friend. 1/5

litchi milk tea: smells like those little lychee jelly cups! wanted it be more milky but not picking up those notes much if at all. still a fan. started off nice and fresh then faded somewhat quickly, but for me honestly I would prefer that over being too strong. would consider picking up a full size, just wish they had roller balls (see above) 4/5

blue raspberry vanilla: gummy wormssss!!! this was a surprise sample and honestly I think it’s my favorite one. a little off putting when a stranger knows me better than I know myself but I’m not complaining. so sweet and fun and fruity without being gross or headache inducing. 5/5

cocoapink (decant samples from sucrecie scents):

black chocolate: this is a heavy hitter, i messed up and didn’t put the stopper back on the sample bottle before rescrewing the lid and now my bathroom cabinet smells like cocoa powder. objectively nice, but i think chocolate scents just aren’t my thing. may try again in the fall! 3/5

pink dragon: like a sweet little pink gumdrop. longevity is a bit mid but this is a very harmless and nice smelling scent that i could see myself wearing on lowkey days, though similar to some other gourmands ive been trying out. 3/5

selkie: got this because selkies are my favorite mythical creature. badass seal women?? hell yeah. anyway, the scent is very nice though nothing tooo special. gives me vibes of drinking sweet coconut water at the coast. i like that they have coconut oil base for rollerball or if you go with a spray you can choose the intensity. want to explore this house more in the future but it’s a bummer cp’s shipping is so expensive (about $12 to my state). makes it hard to justify full sizing if i’m not head over heals in love. 3.5/5

pierrot perfumery (decant samples from sucrecie scents):

morute martyr: smells like… chalk? I only got one test out of this so didn’t fully develop an opinion but smelled like I got sweet ish chalk on my arm. if that’s your thing, more power to ya. 2/5

bats in the belfry: by this point i’m sure you know why I chose this one. in addition, I’m intrigued my the campy spooky branding of this house, similar to lovesick witchery. plus, it’s fairly affordable and who doesn’t want to support a self described gay goblin perfumer? anyway, I’m not sure I’m vibing with this one. at first it’s slightly medicinal but also attic-y. kind of reminds me of tigers balm somehow…? after I went to wash it off it left a lingering incense smell

:-( I want to love it so bad but I think it’s not really something I want to smell smell like. 2/5

the shire: I got this because I’m having a vaguely lotr themed wedding. sweet and warm without being too overpowering, with just the tiniest hint of incense somehow?? sigh. lol. the apple cider comes out the most on me, I think this would be a good a fall scent. 4/5

cardinal scents (decant sample from sucrecie scents):

familiar spirit: i can’t really smell this one very much? has a faint like salted chocolate thing going on. i know this is a fan fav so im kinda disappointed. wish i had gotten a bigger sample so i could try harder to figure it out but i cheaped out with the .3 ml vial and only got two wears. but plot twist, I’m gonna full size in a roller ball just for the hell of it cause i trust yall and i like sage lol ?/5

pearfat (decant samples from sucrecie scents):

multiball: okay so here’s the deal, I loved it when I first tried it. it’s fun, very limey and metallic. but… then I kinda spilled this sample a little on my other samples and all I could smell everywhere was multiball and it started grossing me out. this is 100% my fault but unfortunately I think this scent was a quick high and quick low for me. I will keep looking for a quirky lime scent, but it won’t be multiball. scoring higher out of guilt lol. 3.5/5

knee high: first thought: corn!!!! love the opening note of sweet corn and corn husks, it’s very green and pretty. unfortunately for me the honeysuckle starts to take over the show a bit after the dry down which is a bit too floral for my sensitive head. someone is gonna looove this, and I so wish it were me, but it’s not. 3/5

briix (decant sample from sucrecie scents):

matchatopia: I’ve fallen down the matcha rabbit hole over the last few years so Im surprised it took me so long to try a matcha scent, especially when my first perfume was london fog ! this smells like opening a bag of high quality matcha, with just a hint of sugar and milk. it’s subtle on my skin which I’m fine with except it makes me want to keep sniffing my arm lol. I’m torn if I want to keep trying other matcha scents for the hell of it or just confess that this is a winner and full size…. especially since briix is launching roller balls this summer!! 5/5

sorce (decant samples from sucrecie scents):

snow moon magic: this one has me a little stumped. it’s gotten rave reviews for being a lavender milky chai so I was expected it be similar to lovesick witchery’s london fog but it is definitely not. the masala chai note is there for sure and really lovely, also does not unravel into a candley scent which I was worried about about after long winters naps. however, there is something kinda weird going on in the background that I can’t entirely place. maybe it’s the cashmere? doesn’t give me a headache so I will maybe lock it away for a bit and see if letting it age helps at all. 3/5

match made in heaven: love it! tough to choose between this and matchatopia, they both have a great sweet and earthy matcha note. sorce’s is a bit sweeter and stronger, though i wish there wasn’t that hint of sandalwood and the matcha smell loses a lot of its potency over the day leaving behind a powdery vanilla. not bad by any means, I just want to smell intensely like a tea house. 4.5/5

not indie but relevant:

glossier (secondhand samples):

you: this is kinda meh to me, not bad but nothing special. maybe I’ve unknowingly been smelling it on lots of people? non offensive, pleasant, a bit generic. 3/5

you doux: okay now this is what I’m talking about. the palo santo note is really prominent for me which I adore. give me a hot and dry sauna vibe, or like roaming around the desert with your friends. I guess not *all* mainstream is painful or yucky ! 5/5

you fleur: reminds me of those little perfume samples that used to come in magazines when I was a teenager. as far as florals it didn’t kill my head, but idk I just don’t want to smell like teen magazines/flowers. 2/5

kuumba made (rollerball from website):

vanilla bean: this one helped me realize I don’t think I understand what perfume vanilla smells like lol. one time at a butterfly sanctuary I had to privilege of smelling a just opened vanilla pod straight from the orchid. that shit was GOOD and that’s what I want to smell like. with some reddit scrolling I settled on this in an attempt to replicate that scent, but alas it’s got an underlying like itchy perfumey smell going on? maybe it’s the amber which is indeed listed but I ignored with high hopes. if you can find me the perfect photorealistic vanilla bean, I will be forever in your service, but for now, I am avoiding vanillas lol. 3/5

pacifica (full size from website):

sunrise moon: got this after my initial lovesick witchery order because I remembered having I think a pacifica solid perfume hanging around in college that I liked. this one was a big nope for me and helped solidified that I ought to avoid sprays. too fruity, too floral, instant headache. I will say I gave it to a friend and she loves it though, so to each their own. 2/5

montana sky: got this on sale as a body mist after discovering my love for you doux. indeed does smell very similar pretty but a bit lighter and airier, which was the hope by going with the body mist! will be great for smelling fresh and imagining I’m outside while doing homework on a hot day, without suffocating anyone (including myself) 4.5/5

overall winners (will wear often this summer for sure and if it’s a sample I’ll full size when it runs out):

london fog by lovesick witchery

night flyer by olympic orchids

matchatopia by briix

you doux by glossier (sorry not sorry)

litchi milk tea by haus of gloi

honorable mentions:

familiar spirit by cardinal scents

woodcut by olympic orchids

blue raspberry cotton candy by haus of gloi (okay I know I rated this one higher than litchi milk tea and I do love it but I just think I’d wear it less often realistically)

blood orange marshmallow by haus of gloi (winner if it had a rollerball, I’m too accident prone for open neck)

scents that don’t jive with in the current summer heat but I’ll probably throw into the rotation in the fall:

ghost puffs by haus of gloi

black lodge by little book eater

the shire by pierrot perfumery

sea of trees by andromedas curse

well what did I learn through this quest? I do indeed like tea latte scents, I do indeed like smelling like the woods, I do in fact dislike florals, andddd I need to work on curbing my impulse spending but also the world is so scary and dopamine is so fleeting and, well, what’s another $3 sample, am I right?

lookout for more reviews of lovesick witchery, cardinal scents, olympic orchids, and pierrot perfumery coming in the near future! also hoping to try out the indie house area of effect soon because whattttt do you meeaaann there are zelda perfume oils?? also curious about wylde ivy, something strange, and pineward, and hoping to sample some more mainstream scents that came up in my research such as father figure by phlur, no 4 by maison louis marie, and not a perfume by juliette has a gun. if you think there’s anything else I should try please let me know, my nose will thank you and my wallet will not! also, if you made it this far, you are a trooper.