Anxious

I’m feeling a lot of emotions again. I liked being solo with the kids. It’s hard and stressful, but I wasn’t covered head to toe in anxiety like I am now that my husband is here. It’s constant. He is what gives me the most instability. Our vacation picks up the instant he arrives. Hurry up and go to bed. Hurry up and go to this place and the next, with tiny margins for traffic and construction. Each day is completely full of activity. We are driving eleven hours in two days starting Friday, plus wherever we need to go to get the RV. He told me his dad wanted to join us on this trip when he found out on father’s day. I feel like crying. I want to have sex but I’m too disgusting for him. He doesn’t like my scent. My female scent.