Husband cheated over 16 years ago

My ex-husband and I reconnected romantically after 16 years apart. I was the one who filed for divorce 16 years ago, and after that, I took the kids and did not allow him to talk to them or see them again. He had moved out of the country, so it was easier for me to keep him from finding us.

My children are adults now, and they want nothing to do with him. I know that is partly my fault because they do not really remember him, since I kept them away from him for so long.

Now that we have reconnected, I asked him about the cheating that happened during our marriage. He told me that with one woman, he had strong feelings for her, had sex with her more than 10 times, and slept at her house almost every weekend. Back then, he would also leave me for months at a time and say that we “weren’t together” because I kept accusing him of cheating, even though he actually was cheating. He would disappear for months, not call, not come home, and I would have no idea where he was. One time, he even changed his phone number.

He cheated several times, and most of the cheating felt emotional and long-term, not just physical. Even though all of this happened many years ago, I still cannot seem to get over it. Is it normal for me to still feel this hurt and stuck after all this time?

tl;dr reconnecting with x husband who cheated 16 years ago how can I forgive him if I still cannot get over the cheating?