[M4M] ([T4B]) Vows of the Order - a literate, historical romance (medieval Teutonic Knights)

I am 18+ and all participants and characters must be 18+

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A pair of steps, one heavy, one uncertain, broke the silence, as one of the Knights led a young man into the chapel. Donning but a woolen cloak, the novice knelt before the Komtur, an aging but forceful figure whose graying hair and scarred face emanated an air of wisdom and experience. For a few fleeting moments that must have seemed an eternity to the nervous young man, he stood in silence; finally, he spoke.
“What do you seek?” he said in a ceremonial, proclamatory tone.
“God’s mercy and the fellowship of the Order.” replied a heedful but determined voice of a youth.
“Are you married, or bound to a woman by promise?”
“N-no, Sir.”
“Do you owe debts you cannot repay?”
“No, Sir,” came a more confident response.
“Are you bound in service to another lord or master, or in vows to any other order?”
“No, Sir.”
“Do you suffer from any ailment or infirmity that would prevent you from serving the Order or fulfilling your vows?”
“No, Sir.”

The old man beckoned towards Dietrich. That was his sign to step forward towards the altar, away from the Knight Brothers, who stood solemnly in lines of dozen on both sides of the chapel, their mantles blending in with the hall’s white walls into a sea of white interrupted in regular intervals by the image of a cross, simple, pitch black, imposing - the Order’s symbol, sewn into each of their woolen ceremonial gowns. He carried one such mantle folded in his hands as he stood upright next to the Commander.

“You see the white mantle, a symbol of our Order, our Faith, and our Honour.” The Komtur began as Dietrich remained in complete silence. He was a tall, imposing man with the broad-shouldered stature of a warrior, though the face hiding behind thick raven hair, a bush of beard and piercing gray eyes hinted rather at a man of strict and ascetic devotion, a soldier of God, not a mercenary of Glory. He sensed the novice’s sights setting upon him ever so briefly.
“I tell you, these walls offer you hardship rather than comfort. You shall devote your life to the Order and to God, you shall renounce your worldly possessions for hunger, poverty, and prayer, you shall renounce your familiar ties for fraternity of Knights and Brothers. If you seek comfort, leave now. If you seek wealth, leave now. If you seek glory…”

Dietrich allowed himself the briefest moment of respite, and glanced down on the man before him. The youth must have been only a few years above twenty, a youthful look to him, eyes brimming with excitement, fear, anxiety and eagerness all in one. His hands… his hands looked so cold, white and blue like the hands of a dead man, a constant trembling betraying life still present. The thought hit Dietrich like a sword to the back of the neck: Heed the warnings, boy. Be sure of what you are accepting. The regret was immediate, as if the very thought was treason, and the knight felt disturbed with himself. A drop of cold sweat lingered on his temple.

“Then, Wilhelm of Hochburg, we receive you as a Knight of the Order of Brothers of the German House of Saint Mary in Jerusalem. Receive this mantle and bear it with honour.” Dietrich only came to himself just then, when it was time to put the gown on the new knight’s shoulders; he did so with hands as trembling as his were just moments before. What got into him, he wondered…

“May the Lord bless and keep you, and may He strengthen you in faith and courage, and give you strength to keep the vows of obedience, poverty, and chastity.”
“Amen.” The whole room replied in unison.
“Rise, Brother.”

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Plot and characters
I hope the writing sample I provided above was an enticing enough introduction to the world and setting I want our story to take place in. I had the idea after recently having seen The Valley of the Bees, a Czech New Wave film that kept me thinking about it for a long time. I don’t wish to spoil the movie should you decide to watch it, but it concerns a young man who was, because of circumstances, made to promise to join the order of the Teutonic Knights. He develops a friendship with an older knight, who takes up the role of his mentor and protector, Armin, but after many years, the yearning for freedom causes him to run away, upon which Armin sets out on a long journey to find him and bring him back.

It’s simple enough, but I find its themes of a conflict between freedom, personal happiness and fulfillment versus duty, religion and a higher principle very narratively compelling, as I do its setting on the dreary, cold Baltic coast. What isn’t clear from my description of the plot is the fact that there is a very palpable homoerotic tension between the two men in the film; I am not sure of how intended it is, but it is very visible, and gives the story another quite interesting layer - the knight sees the youth’s treason of the order as a treason of himself, his journey being both a journey of honour and of yearning for love, jealousy at his beloved for choosing a life of physicality over a life of manly brotherhood and asceticism. Its themes of dogma, ideology, fanaticism and their struggle with personal freedom are primary, but it is very easily and compellingly read as a tragic love story, too.

I don’t wish to recreate the plot of the movie together, of course not. But I felt it fair to talk about it as an important influence for this prompt, and I would like to deal with the very same themes it offers, even though our characters may be different, their backstories may be different, the results being different. I just find it very compelling and having a great narrative potential, and I absolutely enjoy these chivalric, all-masculine settings of male brotherhood which create an outlet for a kind of intimacy these men have renounced, just as I enjoy the themes of guilt, forbidden romance, and faith. 

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My profile:

I’m looking for a detailed roleplay partner with an interest in history, and long-term, literate storytelling. My preferences in writing are a narrative style using third person and past tense (although I don’t mind first person, either – but third person is my preference) and longer texts per message. I don’t want to set a hard limit on the exact number of paragraphs I require; if need be, I will say I average about two to four paragraphs, but I find it very situational. When suitable, I enjoy delving deeply into physical descriptions and thoughts or emotions of characters, but some scenes require a rather more brisk and dynamic conversation and reactions. It’s this sense for context I like in a partner!

I also like detailed out-of-character discussions about the plot, what we would enjoy happening next, debating what would work best; it is for this reason that I prefer to roleplay on discord, as I enjoy the possibility of creating a server with dedicated channels for OOC discussions, character lore, and the roleplay itself.

My primary interests are historical, “realistic” roleplays. Just to clarify with what I mean with realistic: I enjoy trying to recreate the time and place in which the specific story is set, along with social attitudes, available technology, and so on. That doesn’t mean that our story would have to pass the review of an expert on everyday life at the time! We’re not writing a documentary!

Of course, I would like to discuss further details of our characters’ backstories, the plot we want to follow and other aspects. I’m sure if you have an interest in history and this sort of setting for a story, we can have a lot of fun with discussing and creating realistic characters and settings for this even before the roleplay itself!

Another important thing - smut vs plot. I'm definitely much more side plot on this issue. Obviously, a story involving romance is bound to lead to physical affection, and I enjoy writing such scenes, but I usually don't like to linger too much on them. I prefer even sexual scenes to be written tastefully and in a more romantic, literate manner. I find erotic and romantic tension more interesting, as well as both the buildup and fallout from a sexual scene more than such a scene itself. Thank you for understanding!

To reiterate – I am interested in playing on discord, although I prefer to chat on reddit before to see if we are in general compatible. I am located in CET time zone.