feeling defeated and alone :(

Hey everyone. I’m 19 years old and I’ve been dealing with very intense and frequent PVCs since about 13-14. Originally, I didn’t care much and it didn’t bother me until highschool. However, as I get older, the worse they become. I originally complained to a pediatrician the summer before my sophomore year who then ordered me an ECG which came as inconclusive. Then, I was referred to a cardiologist. he ordered a 48hr holter monitor for me to wear, and it came back with proof of arrhythmia and that’s the first time i’m officially told I’ve been having PVCs. Finally, he ordered a month long holter monitor that evidently satisfied him enough to where he suggested beta blockers. I was young and dumb and I said no. What 15 year old wants to take heart medication? I didn’t.

Well, they got worse. I got an Apple watch for funsies this past Christmas and SURPRISE! Turns out my heart has been pumping in overdrive the entire time. So, I went to my doctor and she put me on beta blockers (albeit a teeny tiny dose to avoid dropping my blood pressure). Sure, I was a little disgruntled but I thought it would fix everything. Nah, it doesn’t. My heart rate comes down a little and my blood pressure is still normal but the PVCs are still there and they feel worse, more frequent and prevalent. Okay, easy peasy, we’ll just up the dosage! Well, my heart rate comes down even more and my blood pressure is still okay, but the PVCs just will not leave! They’re constant and they’re horrible! I feel so upset and defeated that I’m having to deal with this and no one else in my IRL social circle can relate to me. Everyone else around me is able to do sports, to workout, and use their body as intended. I hate to seem whiny, but I’m a little scared. My doctor is suspecting that it’s either a physiological issue that will hopefully show up on an echocardiogram, or an electrical issue that’ll have to most likely be albationed since the beta blockers didn’t do anything rhythm wise. We’re about to get some tests ordered, then get a referral to an adult cardiologist. Either way, it feels like an EP study is guaranteed in my future and it is HORRIFYING. Can anyone relate? I just really need support at the moment. Thank y’all for listening :(