MCA faked my death

Disclaimer: this happened months ago

So I have this ex na I’d say quite mentally unstable. We’re both filchi, met her somewhere in Cebu, she’s crazy rich, and has daddy issues. Her mom would do anything just to keep her sane. When we parted our own ways, I never mentioned that I broke up with her because of her sanity. But that’s another story. Her mom would call me whenever she thinks na nawawala sa landas yung anak niya. I think momma had no clue that we broke up. She never told her mom. Because her momma would still call me like nothing happened. Since I’m from Manila, it’s either she would see me here or I would see her in Cebu. Umabot sa point na pati yung ex ko ginugulo ako lalo na yung mom niya. I get distracted, all the time. So I came up with this plan na palitawin ko na namatay nalang ako bigla. Don’t ask me how hahahaha. But yeah, her mom believed it. Hired someone with this expertise and voila - they think I’m dead. And the guy who arranged this story was smart enough to deliver the news to them just a few hours from my so called “libing”. Para no chance na makapunta sila sa funeral kuno. Turned out successful. No ones bothering me and I’m living in peace.

To my ex-gf - you gave me the best sex I ever had and the looks that I’d never get tired of looking at but you’re unhinged. Thanks for showing genuine compassion even if my death was just for show.