AIO for Feeling Uneasy to Play GTA 5 Online With my Boyfriend

Hi all,

I’m a 31-year-old female in a relationship with a 37-year-old male. We’ve known each other for almost seven years, and we’ve been in a relationship for one year. We gravitated toward each other because of our shared love of video games. Recently, we’ve been playing GTA 5 Online frequently, trying to make money by completing missions. The game offers various missions for players to complete and earn money, but mishaps can happen during those missions, causing players to lose part of their payout.

For example, we were completing one of my boyfriend’s missions where there are three boats, each carrying five items that need to be delivered to different locations. While I was maneuvering one of the boats, I accidentally drove it onto land, causing it to explode along with the remaining items. My boyfriend was upset because it meant he wasn’t going to receive the full payout. I apologized and felt bad for making the mistake and costing him money. I tried explaining that it was an accident, but he wouldn’t let it go. Then, several games later, we were doing another mission involving airplanes, and I crashed into a tower and blew up. Again, it was an accident, and I wasn’t looking forward to hearing about it from my boyfriend.

My boyfriend has also gotten my vehicle stuck during a mission, causing me to lose my payout. I was annoyed, but I tried not to make a big deal out of it like he has in the past. I understand that mistakes happen, and once they do, there’s nothing you can do except keep playing.

Today, I played with my boyfriend and his friends. His friends were welcoming, and we were all chatting while completing missions. Everything was going well until we were doing one of my boyfriend’s missions, and guess who got their plane stuck between the boat’s sails? Me! As soon as it happened, my stomach dropped, and I said out loud, “Please don’t get mad. The airplane is stuck between the boat’s sails.” His friends laughed, but my boyfriend stayed quiet. Then he said that this wasn’t the first time something like this had happened. I felt so small and embarrassed, especially since I’m naturally clumsy and make mistakes all the time. Feeling attacked, I said, “I’m never going to hear the end of this.”

Everyone went quiet. About five minutes later, one of his friends logged off. Then, another five minutes later, his other friend logged off as well. I asked my boyfriend if he was upset with me, and he said he was annoyed that I had made that remark in front of his friends. He said they didn’t need to hear that and insinuated that I had made them uncomfortable and was the reason they logged off. I told him that I had meant to mute my mic but spoke before I had the chance. We ended up logging off for the night.

AIO for feeling like I’m not completely in the wrong? I admit that I shouldn’t have made that remark in front of his friends. At the same time, I think his friends should know how intense he can be when it comes to gaming. I didn’t apologize to my boyfriend. I’ve tried explaining to him how uncomfortable he makes me feel when he becomes excessively critical of my gameplay and mistakes. Whenever we play together, I feel like I have to do everything perfectly, or else he gets annoyed and says hurtful things to me.