On the edge

So I'm feeling very overwhelmed and super guilty and not really sure what to do.

My baby girl is nearly three months old and lately (understandably) she's been super fussy and clingy in this heat and suffice to say, I've had enough.

My husband has been working a lot; he was on a late shift Thursday so left for work at 12 and then was called out Thursday night. He didn't get home until 3am so naturally slept all morning. He then had to do another shift and was on call again last night. As he was working, I had to have the baby that evening and by 9 I was spiraling. She just would not settle. One minute she wanted milk, the next she didn't. One minute she was fast asleep but as soon as I put her down she'd wake. I put some headphones on and tried to listen to my music to drown out her crying but as she was fussing, she was super fidgety and thrashing about and this was making me hot and bothered and I just snapped. I raised my voice at her and put her in her cot. I just couldn't hold her anymore. My husband at this point was home and came and got her but I felt terrible. I didn't hurt her I just raised my voice but honestly feel awful for even getting to that point. She's a baby, she doesn't understand and I know crying is her only way of communicating.

Honestly feel like the worst mum alive 😞