I’m just exhausted and frustrated about this whole taking sides thing.

I’ve been having this issue lately about having to take sides and I’m now wondering is it me, am I missing something?! At my wedding my officiant, a family friend that has supported me through moving to a new area and supported my relationship with my partner and has done so much to make sure I was okay during my breast cancer treatment said to my best friend that they should come up more often. I agreed internally because they’ve never come out to visit me until it was my wedding. Not even during my cancer treatment did they come out. My best friend becomes pissed, assumes we were talking behind her back and it became a whole ordeal without the officiant knowing. At this point my best friend and I are on hi bye terms. Best friend was mad because I didn’t see anything wrong with the officiant saying she should come out more often.

Tonight I took a family member out, we had a great time, we go to this store because they want to buy me a gift even though I’m not asking for it, they want to get it. In the midst of purchasing it the cashier asked if they had a chase card, they say they don’t and they don’t want one not understanding that they aren’t asking to sign them up but to give them a discount because it’s the stadium and if you’re a card holder there are discounts. The cashier says “well this ain’t a bank” and that’s when the family member gets upset and in a way snaps at this cashier.

We leave the store and they get upset at me for not taking their side. I mean to the point where people are passing by and I’m getting lectured as if I did something wrong. I think there’s miscommunication on both parts but also things shouldn’t have been said. I also think I’m not arguing with a cashier, I’ll ask for a manager real quick.

All this to say, I get taking sides when there’s a clear reason to especially when it’s discriminatory on any level. Neither one of these instances was that. It was miscommunication and perception based. I’m exhausted that the person who feels attacked instantly makes me an enemy for not seeing it the way they do. Am I wrong for not essentially picking a side?