Just need to write it out

Just been looking for somewhere to post about this, I dont know if it's here but hey ho! sorry if this is a ramble!

ive been dealing with huge anxiety and panic for a very long time and have ASD and have recently been using alcohol to cope, im under a mental health team in the uk who have given me anti depressants etc but still been struggling! I dont drink all the time only when I really feel I cant cope! I called a helpline which got me put into hospital last week but they discharged me within a few hours in the early hours, I had no charge on my phone and no way of getting home so I just laid on a bench out side the hospital for a few hours not knowing what to do!

After a few hours a man came along very sympathetic and I just felt desperate for some anxiety relief and he seemed kind and reassuring! He offered me some alcohol which I know was stupid to take but I was desperate to feel calm and long story short he took me back to his to charge my phone and I ended up being assaulted by him and his friend.. use your imagination! They took my phone off me and I was with them for over 24 hours but I managed to get it back and send my location to my mum who called the police and I was pulled put of there!

My family obviously knows, but my friends dont and what's worse I have a boyfriend, fairly new who I feel I have betrayed since I agreed to go with this bloke in the first place! I don't know!

Just feel I needed to type it out!