I did my best.

I think I’m gonna kill myself and I’ll be successful this time. In the past I’ve gone the pill route but my body rejects it everytime. I refuse to end up in someone’s hospital for a week especially now that I work in a hospital like how embarrassing would that be. I’ve never wanted to be in pain while dying . But I guess the pain will be worth it if I don’t have to live another day in this world that has only caused suffering. There is absolutely nothing worth staying here for. I just want to be with my mom.