Why?? TW- sexual abuse, child abuse, physical abuse.

I got out, he broke up with me a year ago because I refused to allow him to abuse our baby, when he lost some of the control he had he couldnt handle it and ran. Because I had to allow visitation (i fought it hard) I did but he hasnt seen his child in 6 months and before that only had a handful of visitation on special occasions (he only asked to see him again because i ran into a family member of his who cooed over my child and said hes huge now and asked questions about him and asked "could i see him without....well just me" to which i replied of "course we will set something up". He sent a text saying he would start seeing him again 30 minutes after his family member and I said goodbye.

He now wants to start seeing his child again but I have a case for child abandonment. I have people, members of my own family saying "if you could just get along with him it would be so much easier for you" i lost it because when he first left those same people kept pushing the same just get along mentality, i asked the person who said it "this man abused a baby, sexually abused me, physically abused me and did these things in front of a disabled family member who couldnt speak up about it and you are again pushing me to get along with that person?" I hung up because i raised my voice and was now crying, they called back later and said "we needed to be able to habe hard conversations without you losing it" so I said if someone had broken into my home beat me up, hurt the baby and did it all in front of a disabled person who couldnt help or speak up would you be telling me to be nice and just get along with that man. They claim thats a different situation but it isnt especially when i thought i had finally gotten my family to understand how bad the situation was. Im devastated. I only have one person in my life and its this same person who has started pushing for me to just be nice again. When the family member called back they didnt even apologise. Why should I be nice why should I just get along with someone who wouldn't take no and stop for an answer who left me bruised and now scarred, who hurt my baby and mentally hurt my disabled family member (also a minor), make it make sense to me because I dont get why I should be nice.