I catch myself holding my pee bc it feels good, i feel so gross, is this normal?

I (19f) don’t really mean to do it, I just.. don’t feel any signs until suddenly I do. I don’t feel any urge to go to the bathroom, I don’t feel pressure or whatever you’re supposed to when you gotta go. I just suddenly start feeling “good” suddenly, and I don’t really feel anything else. I try really hard to get to the bathroom, but I feel so gross because it happens in public. i’m in the store or the library, and then suddenly there’s this spike of pleasure and its so damn overwhelming. it makes me cry but it doesn’t hurt, i just don’t get it. is this normal? is this something i need to worry about? or am i just a weirdo overthinking it? :(