I'm really beginning to resent my father.

My father has severe Alzheimer's and dementia related psychosis. He's pretty far gone. Can't hold a conversation, can't really do anything for himself. I take care of him in the mornings. I need to watch him like a toddler. He gets bored and restless so he just wanders around aimlessly messing with EVERYTHING. I am constantly undoing everything that he does. He sees dirty laundry? He knows its supposed to go somewhere but doesn't know where. He'll pick up the dirty laundry and put it in the toilet. If you try to stop him he gets frustrated. He tries to talk to you and ask you questions but nothing he says makes sense. If you don't respond the way he wants? He gets mad.

Today it was like 93° with about 85% humidity. It was miserable out. Every two minutes he would go outside and I'd have to follow him to make sure he doesn't wander off. I finally usher him back inside, get him sit down on the couch and sit down myself and he immediately hops back up and heads back outside. When he's outside I ask him "whatcha doin?" In a nice way and all he says is "I don't know". I try "It's hot out, wouldn't it be better inside?" And he refuses saying "I have to get this done!" And he just starts walking in circles and moving rocks out of the garden (which I have to move back).

He also gets really angry for no reason. He'll ask me "Where did everybody go?" And I'll nicely reply with "What do you mean? It's just you and me hanging out." He gets furious at me and yells "Why would you do this to me?!? GET THE F*CK OUT!!". After this he'll either remain angry indefinitely or switch to crying hysterically. When he's angry or crying hysterically he hits himself in the head so much that I have to try to restrain him which only makes him more upset.

I have so much stress already in my life, but taking care of my dad like this makes me even more stressed/ upset/ frustrated. I'm also so terrified that I'm going to be like this soon.

I know it's not his fault, he can't control it. I try to be as sweet and understanding as possible but I can only do so much. I dread going over every day. I find myself resentful towards his behavior (that I know he can't control). I just don't know what to do. How to avoid getting angry myself. I've avoided having kids because I don't have the patience to take care of kids, yet here I am forced to take care of my dad like he's a 2 year old.