Help Me Pivot (or at least read about it)

Female. Just turned 50. Not married. No kids. Been stuck in an endless loop of procrastination, laziness, and overwhelming guilt. I feel like a failure in every aspect of my life. My life does not look anything like I imagined when I was in my 20s and pursuing a PhD in English/Post-modern American literature. I want to turn things around. I'm not really sure how I ended up here--it just happened. I used to be an exceptional over-achiever in nearly every aspect of my life, especially work/career/education and public/community service. I want to live a meaningful life, but I know that will require changing my ways. What can I read that will inspire me to change? What can I read that will allow me to see that a person can fail and/or make poor choices and still redeem themselves? What can I read that will inspire me to LIVE life--to make my passions priorities? What will make me laugh at my mistakes and move forward stronger than ever before? What will match my mood that this is my last ditch effort to give it a real go? I place great importance upon words on a page. I think reading will be the only way to reach my turning point. Suggestions from all genres welcome. Thank you and best to you.