Scalp picking so bad I got asked to reschedule a haircut :(

My dandruff and hair pulling/skin picking has all been so bad that I just wanted a fresh start, so I'd had this appointment booked for weeks as a "goal". I had a good week of not picking, but eventually the habit won out and I had, like, two really bad episodes right before my appointment, which was supposed to be tomorrow. I sent pictures to my stylist because I was so embarrassed of being potentially turned away in person, and she very professionally and politely suggested I reschedule.

I'm kind of crushed. I think I've also been having some hair thinning issues (going to a derm soon to figure out if it's the picking/pulling, the dandruff/sebderm, or something else), so I really wanted a pro to help me style it. But at this point, I honestly think I might just lop off the bulk of it (I have locs) so that I can wash and take care of it easier, and then hopefully I can have her shape and style whatever is left once I get my scalp health and picking under better control.

Would love some good vibes because I feel so embarrassed and gross rn :(