Need genuine advice for future as a neet failure

I've never posted anything on reddit..this is gonna be my first post i am a neet dropper (3yrs) ...not scoring well idk what to do in my life anymore....my mother is v supportive but my father is literally killing me everyday with his taunts and remarks on me to the point i have become suicidal...my parents never communicate what me or my siblings have been feeling...they think it's v immature...idk what to do didn't do partial drop ever bcz thought it would affect my neet ... earlier this year my father was saying if i didn't get selected he'll send me abroad but now suddenly he has changed his mind maybe bcoz my grandparents had brainwashed him into thinking that sending a girl abroad is not worth it she'll ruin our family's name....idk what to do seriously...i was thinking about taking admission in bds private but he's not agreeing with me and wants me to do bums I don't wanna do that....i am considering bsc biotechnology or biochemistry from some university outside my hometown and partial drop for neet ..or full drop for neet from subject wise coaching.....Please tell me your advices it will be v helpful for me...and suggest some universities i can apply.