I hate being scared to be feminine

I’m scared to shop in the women’s section and I’m scared to wear women’s clothes, wear makeup and paint my nails. I’m scared to ask the hairdresser for a feminine style. I’m scared to ask a salon to feminize my eyebrows and etc.

I’m sure this anxiety will dissipate the longer I’m on hrt and after I bite the bullet and come out to everyone but I’m so envious of how cis women get to do all these things without the same constraints.

(Not that cis women can’t have social anxiety but I think my point is clear.)