Starting Effexor and my side effects.

Hi, I just started Effexor 12 days ago followed by stopping flouexatine. I was fine mostly for the 37.5mg dose that I did for 5 days but when I hit 75mg I started to just feel derelization, higher anxiety, agitation, and just overall not feeling like myself. I’ve now moved up to 112.5 mg for a week then I move up once more and staying at 150. I’m on day three of 112.5mg and honestly I’m just scared. I feel like I’ll never be myself and I’m just got the worst intrusive thoughts and ruminating since I’ve started. I know it need time to balance out and I will give it that time but for now it just feels very sad and isolating. I cry just thinking about maybe never being myself again. I just wanted to see if anyone else dealt with this and just maybe some motivation as it can be very sad to get through this bumpy patch.