[29M] I think I need to stop making finding love the center of my life

29M from Casa. I think this is the first time I've been completely honest with myself about this.

I've had a few experiences with women over the years, but nothing ever became a real relationship.

For a long time, it really messed me up.

I kept wondering what was wrong with me. I'm obviously not everyone's type but I don't think my appearance is the reason either.

I just always felt off: Socially awkward, quiet, not very charismatic.

Like everyone else somehow learned how to flirt, date, build relationships... and I completely missed that train.

Seeing people my age move on with their lives while I was still stuck in the same place hurt more than I like to admit.

At one point I genuinely wondered if maybe I just wasn't meant for relationships.

Lately though, something changed.

I'm not sure if it's because I'm getting older or because I'm simply emotionally exhausted but I don't feel like chasing it anymore. I can't keep putting my life on hold.

Instead, I want to spend the next year or two working on myself.

Getting healthier. Building a career I'm proud of. Meeting people without the pressure of trying to turn every connection into something romantic. Doing some volunteering. Finding hobbies that get me out of the house (started hitting the gym, going for walks/runs...).

I still hope I'll meet someone one day but I'm also trying to make peace with the possibility that it might never happen. (this is soooooo hard but it is necessary)

Uninstalled all dating apps and going monk mode for a bit.

I was wondering if anyone here has ever done the same.

Have you ever deliberately stopped looking for a relationship for a year or two and focused entirely on yourself? Did it help in the end ?