Most of my sexual life has been meditated by cannabis. I lost my virginity high to the same boyfriend who first taught me how to get high. Cannabis is my absolute favourite when it comes to sex.

Now that I know I’m ND (dx 39), that finally makes sense for about 100 reasons. I am fascinated at how smart our bodies are at trying to get what they need (ps the emerging research on autism and endocannabinoid dysregulation is FASCINATING, especially the seeming role of anandamide the supposed “joy” molecule).

Among other benefits, it turns my mind off and lets me be wholly in my body and the present moment. Sensation is amplified, self consciousness decreases, arousal increases.

Issue being, I cannot, should not, use it anymore.

I’ve experienced cannabis induced psychosis twice, once in my early 20s, and again at 39. Both times came from heavy daily usage; I struggled to leave it in the bedroom but that would always be the thing that pulled me back after long stretches of sobriety.

Now I’m 41, rebuilding life after the implosion from the most recent episode. (Whole big other conversation about our brains and substances and altered states and psychiatry and the dsm…won’t go there today tho. Focus!!!)

My sex drive is coming back online so of course so is my desire to consume.

I’ve noticed cannabis and sex is a strong pattern in our community so I’m hoping you other canna-sober pals have ideas…

what are your harm reducing, pleasure enhancing strategies, tips, tricks and substitute substances?

I’m aware of basics…meditation, slowing down, more foreplay, lots of attention to sensory environment, etc. I’m not looking for the 101 class…I’ve even noticed that some of my meds help, like gabapentin does a bit of what cannabis did in terms of embodiment anyway.

But there has to be more?

I’d fucking love if there was some always-safe strain or consumption method I’ve never heard of that’s gentle enough to be safe but strong enough to provide the enhancements I’m after. It probably doesn’t exist but a girl can dream.

what’s second best? 🙏🏼💕😘