How to stay motivated?

I’m currently built solo on a 2x, and haven’t played at all today. Due to not having the motivation to play as I feel I’m shit at rust haha. 1100 hours isnt a lot, but it also is in terms of knowing monuments well and base building. I feel it’s the fighting I just can’t grasp, which irritates me enough to where I am just sitting in base not losing anymore kits. I understand you have to be in those situations to get better but it’s just farm then die, farm then die. I play hellis and other aimtrains and do somewhat decent, but when it comes to a real server it gets thrown out the window. I tried playing with a new team today, but have quit since also. Maybe I need to try another approach to rust, I just don’t know what.