I ate cum for the first time and I dont know how to feel about it

Hi cuties as the title says , yesterday I ate cum for the first time and I dont know how to feel about it.

Yesterday afternoon I was finally left alone in the house so obviously I put on my girly clothes which often turn me on.

I put on some lipstick, put in my vibrating buttplug, watched some femboy porn and texted with strangers. These always make me horny and I alwaya start using my dildo when I feel like Im ready.

But yesterday it was different and I was horny like never before. When I started riding my dildo I felt so horny I couldnt control myself . I was hot , I was moaning loudly and my legs were shaking. I felt like for the first time I'll be able to get a sissygasm

I was so horny that I decided that either I finish with a sissygasm or I finish on my face/in my mouth . After a while I just couldnt help myself and I started touching my clit. I immeadiately put my legs above my head and I opened my mouth wide open to get as much cum I as could

I exlpoded and the hot cum went all over my face but mostly in my mouth. As soon as this happened I just didnt know how to feel . I loved the taste while also hating it , I was proud of myself and felt like a good sissy while also being ashamed . I looked at myself in the mirror and felt both like a perfect cumslut and also felt shame

Sorry for the long wall of text , I just needed to talk about it , did anyone feel the same , I am still not sure how to feel