Just tired of this sadness, I have thoughts but I would never actually do it

I’m a 19 year old male and soon to be 20 in August. My life feels absolutely pointless and devoid of any significance but yet I have no reason to be complaining. I have caring parents, a loving family, am middle class, I have a solid job, I am tall and am not super model good looking but am definitely not ugly either but yet I’m over everything. I deal with incredible insecurities to the point that I hate myself. I am a little chubby(6 ft 3, 195 lbs plus I lift weights and run all the time) and I have crippling body dysmorphia. I have absolutely zero social life at college because I don’t enjoy drinking/drugs and will not do anything that interferes with bodybuilding(ie tracking macros, cardio, weights, sleep) I am contemplating hoping on anabolic steroids cause I could give less of a shit if it’s detrimental to my health because I just want to look good. On top of this I have a really bad binge eating disorder and depression both of which my dad doesn’t believe to be real. I have 1 close friend who is on the other side of the country right now and 1 other who is so occupied with his parents very ugly divorce that I don’t want to bug him with my problems. Besides these two guys I really have 3-4 other buddies that are from high school who I am friendly with but definitely not close. I’ve started going to therapy and seeing a psychiatrist who put me on Prozac but it hasn’t helped. The Prozac has just numbed my emotions to everything to the point and I am indifferent about every decision or event in my life and the therapist tries to help with my body image/eating issues/depression but she’s morbidly obese so I don’t listen to a thing she says cause I don’t respect her. I use to have a great life in high school where I was fairly well known by my peers, a captain of the football team, and was very passionate about my interests like Spanish but now I don’t really give a fuck. I go to the gym everyday, abuse caffeine to get me through the day, and then go back to my room where I listen to three days Grace, seether, Alice In Chains, Korn, rock/grunge/metal etc depressed music all day long. When I do leave my room nobody asks how I’m doing or bothers to check in on the mental battles going on in my head. I am so lonely and sick and tired of being along, I just want to get better. My social circle is non existent at this point outside of a few people, I have no girlfriend and am so insecure to believe a girl would ever like me, have nothing in my day that I look forward to, hate school and am so tired of living the same damn life over and over again. I don’t know what to do, I just keep grabbing onto different self help endeavors expecting them to cover my crippling insecurities and fix my life but I just keep doing the same shit over again. My siblings who are all my age just finished up a great first year of college, making friends, partying, living life, while I transferred after fall semester from my first university and came back home every weekend at my second university to be with my parents since i had no friends. I just want someone in my life to let me know they care and help be fix all this but instead I stay trapped in my head. If you have any ideas I’d be happy to hear them but like I said I’m NOT suicidal nor do I have any plans on ending my life. I believe killing yourself doesn’t answer life’s question of how to live it but rather gets rid of the question all together so from a philosophy standpoint I won’t end my life however it doesn’t make the depression and easier.

TLDR: Life sucks, I use to be someone now I am not and I don’t know what to do to fix it. I think about Suicide but am NOT actually suicidal nor making plans to end my life, I AM JUST LOOKING FOR HELP.