UPDATE; AITA for lying to my friends about having a long distance boyfriend?

original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/s/JwXjxz4aKY

Hi again everyone. I honestly didn’t expect to be back here, but a lot has happened since my last post and people asked for an update.

Short version: the friend group basically blew up.

After everything came out about the fake boyfriend, things were really tense for a while. At first most of the anger was directed at me, which I understood. But once everyone started arguing more, other issues started coming out too. During one of the conversations in the group chat, a couple of the girls started calling each other out for their own stuff: lying about things, talking behind each other’s backs, and generally being pushy or judgmental etc. Apparently I wasn’t the only one who had felt pressured or uncomfortable at different times.

Once everyone started pointing that out, the whole dynamic kind of fell apart. A few people left the group chat, others stopped replying, and now basically no one is talking to each other.

It’s been strange because I was friends with these girls for years and I always assumed we’d stay close. But looking back now, I think there were a lot of unhealthy dynamics in that group that none of us really addressed until everything exploded.

On a more positive note, I’ve actually started spending more time with some other people I knew casually before (including the friend who originally found the fake account). They’ve been really kind about the situation and, more importantly, they actually respect my boundaries. There’s no pressure about dating, no weird “we know what’s best for you” comments, and I feel like I can just exist without being constantly questioned. It’s honestly been kind of a relief.

I’m not pretending I handled things perfectly, I still regret keeping the lie going for so long, but the whole situation forced me to rethink the kinds of friendships I want in my life. Right now I’m focusing on people I actually feel comfortable around and who enjoy spending time together without trying to control each other.

So while the arguments in that friend group were messy, I think it might have been the push I needed to move on to healthier friendships. Thanks again to everyone who gave advice, no matter how harsh it might've been.