I keep fantasising about right-wing cis women undoing me [TW: transphobia, homophobia, misgendering, detransition]

It's a strange one, but bear with me... I'm a trans woman. I've been trans for almost a decade now, and my identity is so completely tied to my relationship with feminism.

And I wish I didn't but... I get so turned on every time I'm misgendered. Every time a transphobe tells me I'm 'tricking' lesbians into sleeping with men.

Anyway, the other day I was fantasising about some transphobic cis woman fucking me... No, making me fuck her. Just the idea of her breaking me... Whispering in my ear to fuck her like a man...

God, what does it mean??