I’m Pregnant three months after teenage son’s death, and I don’t know what I’m going to do.

Hello, i (F40) and my husband (M43) just found out this past week that we’re expecting our second child. Normally this would be a happy moment, but for us it was a moment of dread.

Our son (M19) died three months ago, he was fatally stabbed during a fight at his college. His friends were fighting another group of kids, our son tried separating them and got stabbed through the chest and stomach. He died shortly after on the spot.

Fast forward to this past Friday (June 26), I noticed my period was late, but didn’t think anything of it (it had been late before while I grieving) but the next few days I started feeling pretty sick, and I eventually decided to take a test, and I found out that I was pregnant.

I’m still grieving my son, as is my husband. We have agreed that we’re having our baby and we’re going to try our best no matter what, but it’s hard. I feel like I’m “betraying” my son by creating another life, and I’m “moving on” from his death.

We never planned on having another child, but I also wonder if this is a sign from god, because our son was our only child for 19 years, no other real pregnancy scares, then shortly after he dies, I get pregnant again.

I have several appointments this week to learn more, and I’ve been looking at baby clothes and toys online. I am excited deep down, I love babies and it’s exciting to be a mother again, I just can’t get over the grief and guilt of my son’s death.

Thank you for reading this