Side sleeping comfort - Nemo Tensor Extreme Conditions vs. Sea to Summit Ether Light XR Pro vs. Thermarest Xtherm NXT?

Hello! I was wondering if anyone can comment about side sleeping comfort with the Nemo Tensor Extreme Conditions, ideally in comparison to the Ether Light XR Pro and/or Xtherm?

My situation: I'm a cold-sleeper based in Calgary, and I use a quilt, so a high R value is a must for me. I sleep mostly on my side, and have an athletic build with somewhat broad shoulders (I'm 6'2", 200lbs).

I have a 12 year old Xtherm that seems to have a slow leak, so I'm considering replacing it. The Xtherm has been fine for warmth, but I've often found myself waking up to reposition several times a night as my shoulder or neck gets sore.

For comparison, this spring, I bought a new Sea to Summit Ether Light XR Pro since my daughter will be doing some backpacking with me. Figured one of us would use the Ether Light, the other the Xtherm, and I was hoping the Ether Light would be more comfortable for me.

However, when I've slept on the Ether Light, oddly, I've found it less comfortable than the Xtherm, which seems like the opposite of what a lot of reviews seem to experience. In particular, whereas when I sleep on the Xtherm, I wake up and reposition due to shoulder soreness, with the Ether Light I wake up with my shoulder experiencing pain. I've fiddled with the fullness on both pads, and I think I like how the Xtherm feels a little better - but both feel a little sub-optimal to me.

As a (very very unfair) comparison, for car camping I have a Megamat -- I can sleep on my side all night totally comfortably. The stretch of the top fabric and the way you squish into the mat feels great. It feels like the memory foam mattress I use on my bed at home.

I'm wondering, does the Nemo Tensor have any more "stretchiness" or "squishiness" compared to either the Xtherm or Ether Light XR Pro? Or any features or aspects that might make it less painful on my shoulder?

I've looked at other backpacking pads, like the Neoloft, Megamat options, and Big Agnes pads, but it seems like the 3 I mentioned have the best balance of high R values and not too heavy.

Oh, and I use a Sea to Summit Aeros Pillow, but have a large sized "premium" one coming to help provide a little more comfort in that regard, but that's probably more with head/neck comfort than shoulder.

Thanks so much for any reference points!

EDIT 1 - based on a fellow Redditor mentioning the Nemo Eclipse (in cross-post in the ultralight sub-reddit), I'd throw that into consideration, too, if anyone has reference points. It has a lower R value than these three mentioned pads and my understanding it can sleep a little cooler, which is my hesitation. I sleep cold normally, but practically speaking, I don't think I'd normally sleep in temps below the 20s F. Never below 0 F on purpose. So while I do deliberately want overkill on the warmth factor as a sufficient comfort buffer, I don't need it for -40 or something :)