First relationship - 25f 26m. Advice please, don't know if im too sensitive

Just need some advice on if anyone knows if this is normal. am I too sensitive, I feel insecure. He says everything just a joke

Been with my boyfriend 5 years, he told me about a year into the relationship he doesn't feel love or any other emotion, he said when he thinks of me or his family he doesn't feel love but he knows he just does. There's been a few times thats confused me, if I go to him with a concern about our relationship or if there's something that I feel upset about it'll straight away turn into an argument and hell shout and swear at me, says he can talk to me how he likes cause hes angry and if I tell him to please stop shouting hell say im making him more angry. Last time I went to him about something it ended in him getting angry to the point hes punched holes in the wall (for the first time). There's times where hes threatened a break up 'im this close to breaking up with you right now' or 'if open that door were over'.

Ive gone to sleep crying on numerous occasions and he just tells me to be quiet and/or that he doesn't care. I got a big job offer and wasn't sure if I was going to take it and he said to me 'well how do you expect us to move out on your measly wage? you clearly expect me to pay for everything'.

Took the job and we went out for a friends celebration drinks for her passing her exams and I said to him 'maybe we could have a little drink for me, just me and you' and he said 'no this is about her not you'. Ive just been noticing things and ive been brushing them off and im not sure if I should be just ignoring them anymore. Out with his friends talking about how dogs are allowed on a golf course and hes look at me and said 'yeah thats why I bring her' and pointed at me. It took someone to stand up and say he was disrespectful for me to open my eyes to is it actually not right? I wanted to sit with him on holiday and he told me 'you're not a child or a lost puppy', and instead of saying anything I sat on my own. Also a time I wanted a drink at my parents house, he took it out my hands told me I didnt need it but I could have it for lunch tomorrow at work, and he put the drink back.

Says I look silly if I wear a certain lipstick, so I don't wear it. I just keep thinking of the moments that are amazing its frying my brain