i ended things because i was scared she was going to split black, and now she has

now i regret it so much and just need her back in my life. it wasn't even that she was making me unhappy, she was making me happy, i was just worried it wasn't going to last and ended it because there were some things that werent perfect. i cant handle it, the pain is insurmountable. please someone tell me they might actually come back???

she didn't make things about herself. she was insecure and anxious but she was never hurtful. id get upset and yell at her from other things going on, and she would be sweet and comfort me. i dont even know if she had bpd. she was diagnosed, but i feel it was maybe just ptsd, trauma, and anxiety. some things sound so similar but she was always good to me and very patient, just frequently sad and mistrusting. she acted irrationally but she was patient, and didn't get upset at me. she was my favourite person in the world. i cant even imagine being apart from her for any longer, if she decides to unblock me and i take her back, if i change and she does too is there a chance? could she actually be healthy and normal if she tries? or is it over and done with because she's split black on me now, and i'm never going to see her again?

please, please, please, the pain is unbearable.