***Excerpt from the first part of the article:***

So often, when we as family law attorneys caution newly separated or divorced parents to keep their children “out of it,” clients interpret this as a warning [not to argue in front of their children](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-heart-of-the-matter/202502/how-to-tell-your-kids-youre-getting-a-divorce). Or not to bring their kids into arguments for support in a he said, she said-type of discussion. They are correct to assume this, and I’m happy they do. Though parents may not have a name for these behaviors, they usually say they [recognize the harm](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-heart-of-the-matter/202503/the-risk-of-gender-neutrality-in-assessing-domestic-violence) they can cause.

My conversation with newly separated or [divorcing](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/divorce) parents, however, would be incomplete without my underscoring one more behavior they may not realize they’re doing that is far less noticeable: leaning on their children for [emotional support](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-heart-of-the-matter/202602/the-emotional-side-of-estate-planning), something known as emotional [parentification](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/parentification).

Stolen Childhoods: Divorce and Emotional Parentification - How to protect kids from too much adult responsibility, too soon. (Article by Elise Buie Esq. -  Reviewed by Ekua Hagan - Psychology Today)