Humilated by my college crush

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I was a freshman in college, and I had a class with this beautiful, thick, Black girl. Every time she would walk, her tits and ass would jiggle. We had similar interests; we were both nerds and MCU fans, and she was a dream. We would talk here and there. One day near the end of our spring semester, in one of our last classes, she was sitting with me and some other guys. We were talking about something random—I think it was celebrities—and she randomly came out and said jokingly, I don't want to see you beat your shmeat out loud. I was so embarrassed, I wanted to die. I couldn't even look at anyone else. Shmeat means small meat, btw. It got worse a few days after that. I invited her to watch Marvel's Echo with me in the library. We took one of the private study rooms, and we were in the middle of the episode, and she started rubbing my leg and something else. I was frozen. She felt my dick, and she said, Aww, it's like my little cousins, and giggled. We finished the episode and went to class, where she gave me her Instagram and said, Later, shmeaty. I texted her a few weeks later, and she said she wasn't interested anymore and was talking to a new guy, and said to take this as a learning experience. After I sent her a dick pic for blowing me off. After a while, I found her TikTok and saw her throwing it back. I became a real loser when I saw that (I jerked off to it) she was throwing it back, and I did some things. I felt like a loser. I recently saw that she joined a sorority and is thriving, and she looks great and is doing very well. I think she has a boyfriend now, idk, just saw a picture. I later found out that she did share my dick pic; it got shared around. I overheard some girls talking about it, they pointed me out and everything, when I was getting lunch. I did try to talk to her, but she is a part of a sorority now, and I wanna keep my balls. ( still got the text messages, just ask)