I had a friend in college, and he claimed that he was "dying of pain" during one of our hangouts. I said that phrase to myself this morning, and thought of him for the first time in years

in 2018, I took the bus to college as usual, went to the convenience store by my school, and said hi to him in the parking lot. he said that he just got free weed from his buddy, so I decided to skip class to get stoned with him

we went to another friend's apartment, and I rolled up some joints with king sized strawberry juicy jay papers. it felt like we were smoking receipts, but neither of us really gave a shit

he smoked the full gram doink when I smoked a smaller one, and he immediately wanted to go to a shwarma place. I got chicken on the rocks because I didn't know what else to order. he got something better. we ate our styrofoam boxes of food at a picnic table

he got up, and said he felt like he was dying of pain. he wouldn't stop repeating the phrase. he couldn't articulate how much pain he was feeling very well, so I asked him if he knew english well enough to actually have a dream in english. he said that he didn't have one yet, but that it was a great question to ask people who were learning english. he said I should ask that question more often

he kept saying he was dying of pain, and gave a phonecall to his crush. he said that he'd "drag his dick through a mile of broken glass, just to hear her fart through a walkie-talkie". she took it in jest, and then he kept reiterating that he was "dying of pain"

I've seen a lot of judd apatow style comedy movies, and am not sure where he got the phrase about the walkie-talikie from. but when he said that he was dying of pain, it mirrors how I feel at this very moment

alcoholism is such a nightmare, it can feel like you're dying of pain. but I will have another can faxe 10 to deal with this