I don't want to be arrogant, but I also think people sometimes put the wrong labels on me

I like criticism because it helps me improve, and I know I’m not perfect. But sometimes I wonder: Do I actually deserve certain criticism, or did I just accept it because everyone told me so?

Let's talk about one label to make it easy...

For example, many people say I gossip a lot. But I feel like I usually just share my own experiences involving other people. I did once share something very personal about my best friend with another friend, and I still feel guilty about it. That was gossip (but doing gossip once doesn't mean I do gossip a lot.)

But if something happens directly to me, is talking about it gossip?

For example, a girl was flirting with me while hiding that she had a boyfriend. I already knew through a mutual friend but didn’t tell her because I knew she would probably reveal it later if I got attached (it was her way to friend zone me). When she realized I knew all along, she got embarrassed because it showed I was just being kind, not trying to get with her.

If I tell someone about this incident, am I gossiping about her or just sharing my own experience?

But if a friend tells me their private relationship problems and I tell others, then yes, I consider that gossip.

It's not just about gossip. For example, my family says I have anger issues, but nobody outside my nuclear family even thinks I’m someone who gets angry.

Different people have completely different criticisms of me, and sometimes I genuinely don’t know how much of it is accurate and how much is just based on their personal perspective or experiences with me.