genuinely idk what to do (venty)

isnt posting on alt so ig i gotta do on main) but i like this girl and shes perfect literally in everyway but i dont think she can accept me as a woman i havent transitioned yet but she knows im trans ive talked to her abt it and she just doesnt see it the same way i do im kinda loosing myself and im scared of loosing her i honestly dont think ill meet anyone like her again and i cant think rn ive been crying for the past hour cause idk what to do or how to respond to her she said im beautiful the way i am but i want to rip my body apart everytime i see it i just cant live with myself no matter what i do i feel like lifes gonna tumble into shit either way maybe itd be better since she could console me but id loose it hearing my deadname from someone i like this much i