I fear I'll never find love again

I've been no contact for almost 2 weeks now.Ive been trying to breakup since march but I was struggling to go no contact.He still wants to reconcile really badly and spams my emails everyday since he's blocked everywhere else.This was my first relationship,The one I introduced to my family,The one I thought I'd spend my life with.It was so hard to walk away and breakup and actually stand up for myself amongst all the emotional abuse.Sometimes I feel like an idiot for leaving an emotionally abusive relationship due to the 1% lovebombing that happens every now and then.I fear no one will ever get me or I'll never be loved by anyone again.I wonder if I'll spend the rest of my life alone.I am 25 now I thought I'd be engaged by the time I'm 25.He sends me emails telling me I don't know how bad all the men are and he's a gem and I don't realise that because I don't have experience with men I know he is weaponizing my lack of dating experience against me but I wonder if it's true and if I'm never going to find anyone I click with .I feel like I've failed myself and gone against the life timeline I had for myself .All around me I see people getting engaged and progressing in their love lives while I'm just here.