Covert abuse?

Am I wrong for thinking this is continued cover abuse?

My ex split almost a year ago. Just prior to the separation and after, he refused to do any of the housework, childcare, etc. we still continue to share the house (nesting arrangement for the kids) and he refuses to do anything. He will actually leave the house a mess for me when I get back, and I’m constantly swamped trying to clear the disaster out, and manage my kids solo.

We have been in the process of switching over the house to be in my name since May. It was supposed to be done by now but my ex keeps stalling. He’s added new stipulations in for the house title to be transferred over, which was never ordered by the judge. Then he has the audacity to say I’m stalling. It’s ridiculous.

As well, he has another place to reside on his parenting time and flip flops between staying there and this house. Often times I have to leave to abide by our “nesting” agreement, and he doesn’t even stay here, but will leave a security camera so that if I did occupy the house while he wasn’t here, he’d say I’m spying on her privacy, etc.

He told our kids this past week they would be living elsewhere. I informed him since he’s choosing to do that, then I’m staying at the house. He told me the kids were lying and that he’d be staying at the house and that his name is still on the title so I am not to be there on “his time”. There is no written agreement or court order, it’s just been courtesy.

Anyway, I’m just feeling like this is all control to do what he wants.

If he stays here, he’ll leave it a disaster for me and then gaslight me that he’s done it all (he makes sure to save these special conversations for wizard to make it look like I’m lying) or stay elsewhere and not allow me onto the premises (even tho my name is legally on the title) , just because it’s “his parenting time”.