why do i have a love-hate relationship with my boyfriend, both [21]

we have been together for over 5 years.

i love him a lot but what's unusual for me is that there are phases where i hate him. and when I say hate I don't mean I don't feel like talking to him, I mean cutting him off my life forever and never seeing his face again. i get so annoyed at him that even seeing his face becomes unbearable to me. when i look at him I don't feel love, all I can think of is this one question– what am I even doing with him?

i feel so guilty of these thoughts because ik that person loves me with his whole heart and did nothing major to deserve this. i cry on these nights wondering why is this happening to me why tf did my brain decide to hate him for 2 consecutive days on a random Friday??

does this happen with anyone else or am I nuts

tldr: why do I get phases in my life where i question being with this man