AIO For being upset at my gf for wanting to hang out with friend she slept with.

Hey everyone, this is a loaded one so get ready.

So my gf (21F) and I (22M) have been together for just about a year and a half. As all couples do, there have been some low points, high points, arguments and the whole nine yards. Despite all this I believed we were very happy and in love with each other and I felt she was the one for me.

Those feelings have been challenged a bit by the Fourth of July weekend.

Over the weekend my gf went home to celebrate the 4th with her friends while I stayed behind and worked. The day before the 4th she let me know that she was going to a mutual friend’s house of someone she had a history of hooking up with in the past and that person may be there.

Let me give you a history about this person. I hate this person more than I hate anyone alive. Not just because he slept with my gf, whatever who cares, I slept with ppl before meeting her too. What I hate is how he and her had sex. I’ve been told many a time that he emotionally manipulated her for sex, used her for sex, played with her emotions for sex, and when he lost interest just vanished.

My gf had ALOT of sexual insecurities at the beginning of our relationship and I think his treatment has a lot to do with that.

Flash forward a few months ago, he hit her up. Just a “hey how’s it going” type of text, but I didn’t think it was that surface level. Turns out after asking a friend, he was hitting her up to hookup. I was upset and asked her to cut him out and block him if he’s gonna try to come back into her life like that.

So on the 3rd she said she was gonna go to a friend’s house and he may or may not be there but its no big deal and i was like “i don’t love this but whatever”.

As the night went on it turns out that not only was he there but she then invited him to her house where they had a really good heart to heart and got “closure”. He was also there until about 1 or 2 in the morning.

I got really upset about this and said some things I probably shouldn’t have said but I said them and I can’t unsay them.

We fought over text and so on and since then things have been weird. There have been many red flags.

We went camping together a few days later and things were off. She’s studying abroad for a few months really soon and tried to break things off on day 1 and 2 of our trip. I convinced her we could make it work and we’re “fine” now but I feel weird.

I checked her dm’s with him and she sent a heart emoji to him. Not in a loving way but still.

In the dm’s the dude she’s talking to said he could take me in a fight.

I had trouble building a fire (never been camping) and she asked him how to do it instead of looking it up or helping me herself. She then sent a pic to him after the fire was built.

She added him on letterboxd, even though it took me about a week of convincing for her to add me.

He’s back on her spam instagram account.

She was on her phone a lot during the trip and was distant often which makes me think she was talking to him even if she wasn’t.

And then today when I left camping to go back to work she made a remark about him coming tonight to the camp site and actually making a bonfire.

When I inquired if this was true she got pissed but later apologized.

So tell me am I crazy and what should I do. Theres more but I feel like this post is long enough, if you need anymore context im happy to give it.

Also please dont tell me to break up with her. She’s the love of my life and my favorite person. I more want advice on how to handle this uncomfortable situation I’ve found myself in.