Were my epidurals even helping with my contractions at all? I think I was gaslit into thinking my experience was normal

Epidural only numbed from the hips down, was still feeling contractions. Is that a normal experience?

I don’t know what happened with both of the times I gave birth. I have so much trauma with the epidurals.
I heard pressure is normal but maybe pain not so much.

Both my epidurals went basically the exact same. They worked for a few hours then went downhill fast. I was only numb from the vagina down.
It was hard to tell if the epidural was helping with the contractions or not because I was in so much pain. I was in 10/10 pain, I had a button to push for more and it barely did anything. Eventually, pushing the button didn’t work at all and nothing was helping.
I was on pitocin for both deliveries. I was unable to talk through my contractions.

With my first, I had back spasms along with feeling the contractions and was paralyzed from pain because of it. My daughter was sunny side up so I had a ton of back labor.

With my second I had an immense about of butt pressure along with pain, the contractions were so bad that the only thing that slightly helped was pushing. I ended up with 3rd degree tears with both and stitches, I didn’t feel the tearing or stitches since I was really only numbed from the vagina down.

Both of my babies were over 8lbs each, idk if that really makes a difference though.