I can’t feel feminine no matter what, because of how I look

As a child I was stereotypically very skinny and dainty but after puberty I suddenly grew quarterback shoulders while my hips stayed the same size. My proportions are really awkward to say the least, and to add to that, I’m 5’11. I am basically flat and I can’t help but feel like I look like a dude. It feels as if I’m cosplaying as a woman, but the offensive kind, not charming. I’ve struggled with my appearance so much and because I struggle to feel feminine, I also heavily struggle with my sexuality because there’s literally no reality where I can feel ‘sexy’. I’ve been heavily experimenting with different make up looks, better skin care, different clothing styles to make me feel feminine, but no matter what, I just always feel like I’m shrek in a dress. Even when people tell me it’s not that bad, I think they’re just saying it to help me feel better, instead of being honest. I don’t blame them for trying, but I’m starting to feel kind of hopeless.