Best Parenting Approach

I am sure this is an ambiguous question, but what style of motivation and drive has been successful for you with your daughter? Our daughter started her first full year of "travel" (in our little area) ball last year, and we just completed our second full year to close out 8u. She has primarily played outfield, with a little infield mixed in here and there. In her first year, she was very raw and not good at all, as expected — rarely made good plays on defense, and her hitting ranked last on the team. However, this season she has gotten significantly better at fielding and finished second on the team in batting (avg or obp). A lot of people have commented on her improvement this year and how good she is going to be. That sounds good and all, but my critical parent eyes sometimes struggle to see what they see.

I am always questioning my approach with her to make sure I am setting her up for success. She is currently 9 and going into her 9u season. To date, I have always pressed her to do drills, practice at home, and do tee work. Over the past year, asking her to do these things has gone from a debate to "alright," which shows me she has started enjoying all the extra work. My current approach to everything with her and softball is to see effort, effort, effort, effort. When we get in the car, she will ask how she did, and I will explain her effort on the different fielding plays and her offense (batting + base running). In situations where effort was there but the play wasn't made, I explain why it wasn't made and communicate that I am not mad and don't care whether she actually made the play, because she tried her hardest. This approach has allowed her to be one of a few kids on the team who just resets after any play, good or bad, which I think is a good thing.

So, the question is: what are your guys' thoughts on this approach, and is there a particular age I should start being harder on her so she is tougher? Has anyone had any success parenting an athlete this way? This is our first and only child who plays sports, so I am just trying to do my best. I am totally open to any and all thoughts, suggestions, comments, etc.