I (22F) feel so terrible for not loving him (22M) the same way he loves me. How do I fix this?
Using a throwaway count for this, I don't want him to possibly find this..
We've been dating for only a week. He confessed to me first, and yes, we both have feelings for each other. We've known each other for four years now and were friends before we started dating. (We're in a 5 person friendship circle.)
Out of all my relationships, he's the only one I don't feel a 'puppy love' or 'honeymoon' phase. It's killing me. I don't feel butterflies when he compliments me or expresses his affection for me. He's genuinely a good man - he's everything a girl would want, but I'm struggling to feel that way.
We've only been dating for a short while but I'm already thinking of breaking up because I feel like I don't have enough love for him. I'm not used to being in relationships, first of all. I'm quite content with myself.. I only had a crush on him because he treats me so well and he's pretty cute, but I never really expected a relationship to blossom out of those feelings. I was content with admiring him from afar.
But when he confessed, I took the opportunity to express my feelings as well. I guess I was scared of having him fall into someone else's arms. He's such a good guy that I didn't want anyone else to have him, I wanted him to be mine. But now that I have him, I don't feel anything at all.
While I do appreciate everything he says and does, a part in me struggles to really feel anything.
I don't want to outright break up with him.. we have a date tomorrow, and not only that, I genuinely want to reciprocate his feelings. I want to learn to really love him. I would appreciate any advice, I don't want to break his heart all because a stupid girl like me is struggling to feel things.
Posted Jul 11, 2026, 1:16 PM UTC