I (18FTM) struggle to have sex with my boyfriend (18FTM)

am i un-attracted to my boyfriend, have a low libido, or do i just not have enough confidence around sex ?

i need some advice on sex. i have been dating my boyfriend for nearly 8 months, but i have never been able to bring myself to do anything sexual towards him. we are both FTM trans !

so for context, me and my boyfriend started talking in july / august of 2025, after my friend introduced me to him. right off the bat i knew that i was attracted to him and i wanted to get to know him. we had been talking for around 2 months until we decided to meet up again ( we live 5 hours away from each other ) and we ended up doing some sexual things but not entirely to be sex. after that, we officially started dating and have been ever since, but i feel like either my sex drive is lower than his or i’m just not that interested in sex anymore.

anytime we have seen each other my boyfriend has obviously wanted to have sex, but i have a hard time with actually getting horny and wanting to do anything.

i also feel really awful because even after these 8 months, i have never really touched him in a sexual way / initiated sex. he is always the one to do things to me and it makes me feel really bad, because i just freak out when i think about doing things to him. i don’t know if this is just a confidence thing or what, but it makes me feel awful everytime and i hate it.

i have suspicions that maybe my past relationships have made me feel differently about sex and doing sexual things to other people, because i never used to be like this. i feel like i have an intense fear of not being good enough or not doing something right even though i do have experience ( but because i haven’t actually properly done things myself to my boyfriend i feel like the experience has just gone out the window ).

i really want to improve this and i want to overcome my random fear around sex, but also im thinking is is something else other than lack of confidence ?

any advice and tips would be very much appreciated !!!