She tried to get me trapped in a car with her for 3 hours

I (31F) discovered a concert a bit last minute and was having an hard time finding anyone to go with, and thought my dad would be interested. My parents share a phone number so my enmeshed mom also saw the texts. My dad didn’t want to drive that far but my mom decided that she wanted to go, despite not being into any of the bands and not liking to drive. I did not see that coming. I kept asking if she was sure she wanted to go because of that, but she kept insisting. But she had one caveat: she needed to drive and pick me up.

We live about a half hour drive away from each other, and the concert venue was about 1.5 hours away for both of us. It‘s slightly longer from my place. I suggested going separately because of logistics (and secretly not wanting to be stuck in a car with her). She kept insisting on driving me. I was getting horrible anxiety and some panic at the thought of it so I said I would drive myself. She had bought her ticket at this point but threw a tantrum about how she wouldn’t go if she had to drive all that way by herself. I held my ground despite feeling very guilty and so she decided she wasn’t going to go, and blamed me for ruining her night. “Is it so wrong to want to spend time with my daughter?” I said we would have at the concert. So I went alone and had a great time. I didn’t want her to go in the first place but I figured she would at least be more normal in public.

For more context, there was an added layer of anxiety around it because she had prevented me from learning how to drive as a teenager. I got my license and first car as an adult. One of the many ways she tried to control me. I just had my birthday recently and this year was my first time where I defied the expectation that I celebrate it with my family like a child. My mom didn’t handle that well and accused me of being sick and depressed, then came by my house uninvited twice. Luckily we were out then.

Anyway, I just wanted to vent. I’m trying to decide on an appropriate level of contact with her that doesn’t trigger me and this experience reminded me to never be in a car with her. Any advice is also welcome.