I'm losing faith and I don't know what to do

Ever since I went into my depressive episode I've started losing faith for no reason. I tried my best to read Quran and ask for forgiveness but I've been skipping my Salah and idk why. But i don't even feel bad about it. I ask for forgiveness about something I've done but I don't feel bad anymore which I know is bad. And I know Allah is real and I wish I wasn't like this. But religion is just not my thing. I hate purity culture. I just want to have a boyfriend and be experienced. I wanna do things that non Muslims do because they look way more appealing. I remember crying if I accidentally missed my Salah. I wish I could go back but I lost faith and I don't know what to do