Could The Minions have been present at the Crucifixion of Jesus Christ?

So canon first, the Minions are genetically conditioned to seek out and work for the evilest person on earth at any given time, tying them to the likes of Napoleon and ancient conquering Emperors.

They also had to freeze the minions from 1812–1967 so the minions didn’t work with Hitler.

The minions timeline begins before the Big Bang, and Minions have effectively existed as a constant force in the universe since its inception.

However, the Minions canon timeline has a blank spot of roughly 4000 years between 2500 BCE and 1511 CE.

So there’s a lot of human history to account for.

Religious scholars have debated who is “to blame” for Jesus’ death since the dawn of Christianity, and where the minions were has huge weight.

Putting the minions into the charge of any individual in Jerusalem at the time would settle centuries of debate.

At the same time, if the Minions weren’t in Jerusalem, that casts doubt on the importance of Jesus, and thus Christianity itself, because what could be more evil than killing God’s Son?

That brings us to the hypothesis that the Minions were in Jerusalem during Jesus’ day. The Minions being in the charge of Christ’s killer also lends massive credibility to Jesus being the true Son of God.

Theoretically, the Minions worked under:
• Judas
• The Romans
• Sanhedrin
• God themselves

Judas, I believe, is a nonstarter. I personally believe to blame Judas is to blame God, for God required that their Son dies to absolve humanity of sins. Judas is a true patsy, and a figure I can talk about for hours.

I think the Romans are out as well, because, while brutal, they didn’t care.

To the Romans, Jesus was just another wacky heretic yelling about the Jewish God, a God the Romans didn’t believe in. The Romans only really killed Jesus to quell the outrage Jesus caused the populace. They were brutal and inhuman, but they had no direct beef with Jesus other than him rabble-rousing.

Next, the Sanhedrin. The local judicial order that directly called for Jesus’ arrest and trial. However, the Sanhedrin held little power to enact their justice in Roman-occupied Jerusalem, which wouldn’t be the case if they wielded the unholy might of The Minions.

Which brings us to the final option. Were the Minions a tool by God used to make sure his only begotten Son could die and rise again in fulfillment of the scriptures?

Jesus’ fate was known the moment he was sent to Earth. He was to die to absolve Man of original sin.

“But in order for God to wield the might of The Minions, wouldn’t that make God the truest evil?”