how do i initiate?

24F. my husband and i have been together for almost 8 years. we have a child together. our sex life has been relatively normal and regular i’d say. but lately i’ve found myself confused or often times intimidated by initiating sex. almost like i’m embarrassed or find myself cringey in those times (unless i’ve had a lot to drink then it just comes naturally). my husband has said before that he feels like he’s always the one to initiate it and it’s usually the same way every time. we’ve obviously spiced up the sex part in many ways over the years, that’s not what i’m worried about. but what can i do to initiate it differently every time? usually we’re just laying in bed and i do the obvious big spoon/little spoon grind on him but that’s getting old and used too much. HELP